Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
