It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
