just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
