In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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