You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
