I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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