i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
