piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
