Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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