i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize