i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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