if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
