your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
