is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
