So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
what day is it and did you see me today?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize