i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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