it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
