I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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