i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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