dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
