Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
