well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize