she woke up with a sticky ear
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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