Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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