What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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