if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
