Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
