I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
