LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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