i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
