her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize