Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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