Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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