God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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