Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
