Me too!
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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