are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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