I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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