we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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