I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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