I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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