Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Just puked most of my soul out..
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