Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
