it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
