Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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