I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
