That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
