We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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