Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I just found a bag of teeth...
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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