I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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