you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
