I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
